When I was sleeping

I remember when I was sleeping. You came and whispered in my ears. You didn’t know I am awake I listened everything and felt the tears

You might wanted to hid or you might wanted me to know. What is the thing you can’t tell me. You are cold but it feels like snow

You pretend to be aloof but still you can’t hid you charm. You always try to be cold. But I know you heart is warm

Please say it once again what whispered like bird chirping. That thing you confessed to me. I still remember When I was sleeping

Love internship (story of jazzelle) part 8

The artwork is by my best friend rukaiya. She loves painting. She isn’t studying fine arts yet but her creati

Mumma-papa agreed. I just can’t express my happiness.

For now let’s come to the present.

Rachel and I are in garden.

“Zaayra, I know you never break your promise. And I am not saying to cheat on your parents. You have promised to obey them. And you are not breaking your promise. There is still one month. You asked for 6 month right. And it has been only 3 month since we came here. Your final exams will be held next month. And it will take more than 2 months to get the degree in your hand. When we decided to come here we made the plan right?”

I replied, “ true we made the plan. But everything Didn’t go as we planned. Your course extended for a month, and my internship is getting over before time.”

I still remember when we decided to come here. We were so happy. It was very hard to pursue her parents. But in the end, she persuade them. We made our six month plan first. Because we knew, we don’t have much time. Or should I say, I don’t have much time. Rachel’s parent aren’t thinking about her engagement or something. She is very young. I am not older either. I am only one year elder than her.

Rachel has great potential in painting. Even when she wasn’t learning painting and she was just drawing for fun. She was amazing.
Let me show you her first canvas painting.

We stopped talking there. We are back at home.

On the way back we both were silent. I understand Rachel’s point.

(I shouldn’t do this with her. I was the one who made her see dreams. I was the one who told her make a goal and pursue her dreams. I gave her hope, and when she is finally getting the opportunity to learn to become a wonderful artist, I am telling her to pack up. Just because of my promise and my circumstances. That’s not right. No matter I decide to stay or leave I won’t let her to give up. She must learn.)

We are at home

We opened the door. Though we know nobody is home but we still enter the home by saying, “ we are home.”
It has become our habit. I used to watch Doraemon and shinchan. So this habit came to me from them. Don’t they always enter the house by shouting “we are at home” or ” is anybody home”. It’s something like this.😁

“ Rachel, let me wash up first. Then I’ll make dinner.” I said.

“ okay, what are you going to make.” Rachel asked it like a kid asking to her mom.”

“ red sauce pasta?” I asked.

“ Okay that’s good.” She happily said.

After wash up I made pasta. We had dinner. While having dinner we were watching TV. We almost forget about our situation. We were talking about the drama.

“What should the lead do and the rival (actor) looks better than main lead.”

After having dinner it’s Rachel’s turn to do dishes. She is washing utensils. And I am working on my laptop.

Because superior asked me to be his secretary, I didn’t concentrate on my work. I messed it up. So now I am re-doing it.

My work has finished. Rachel is painting now.


We both finished our work. She asked me to take a look at her new artwork.

I am sitting on the chair. Rachael came and hugged me from behind and said,

“ what are you doing.”

“Talking with tiny.” I replied.

She came in front of me and said,

“again tiny. You have me to share everything with. But still you talk with this tiny.”

(Hey what happened? Thinking about tiny. Who is she? 😁😂) Tiny is my diary. A video diary. I used to make video diary. I share everything with it. I don’t know about normal people. But I am the person who names everything. My bunny (soft toy). And many more. But let’s not talk about this.)

“ jazzelle if you want to make dairy, then write it. Why do you make this video diary.” She is asking me.

“ you know my dear I hate writing.” I answered.

“ You are the only person who dreams to be writer since school time and since school time the only thing you hate is writing. Such an unique one.” she said and knocked my head.

We laughed together. And then I said,

“ now just go. Go and get some sleep. I will make this video and then I’ll be coming.”

“ okay go on.” She said and hugged me. The she suddenly said, “hey jazzelle! What if someone would watch this videos?”

“that’s not possible, without my ID and password noone can see this videos” I put my hand on her head and said.

“fine then. I am going to sleep. You’d better sleep early.” Rachel sounds like my mother.

I am talking to tiny (video diary) now

“ Hey! Tiny. Just now Rachael said why do I need you when I have her to share everything with. But actually she doesn’t know there are many things which I can share only with you I believe you won’t judge me or you won’t make a prejudice about me. Rachael never does this but still she is a human being. Of course she has her own ideas. Let’s not talk about it. Although Rachel knows everything about me but there are something she doesn’t know.”

( Hey friends. This is Zahra. Just now jazzelle said there are something she doesn’t even share with her bestie Rachael. Everyone has their past. So jazzelle also has something she can’t tell. Let see if she can share it with us or not.)

“ You know tiny. I am being selfish now. I am thinking about leaving but I didn’t think about Rachael. Why must she leave with me. Superior is wants me to be his secretary only because his assistant has taken leave for some days.. I know once he comes back he will arrange a new place for me. But if I become his secretary, then…………. I will be the closest person to him. I still haven’t figure out my certain feelings for him. just because of my problems and uncertain thoughts I can’t let Rachael suffer. That’s why I’ve decided to not to leave. I will restraint myself. I will ask superior to not to over my internship. I’ll help him with his work as his secretary whenever he will need. But I don’t want my Internship to be over. That’s all. Good night tiny.” I have talked much with tiny. Let’s get some sleep. I need to talk with superior tomorrow. I need some rest and strength.”

Urdu shayri (ghazal)

अल्लाह करें तेरे दिल पर लिखा नाम हमारा हो
तेरे लबों को जो मुस्कान दे वो काम हमारा हो 

 इश्क की गलियों में जब भी तेरे दिल की हो नीलामी
बोली   में   लगा   सबसे   ऊंचा   दाम   हमारा   हो

कोशिश  पूरी  करेंगे  हम  इश्क  की  राह में जीतने की
उम्मीद है कि जीत के बाद तेरा दिल ईनाम हमारा हो  

हाल यूं है कि सारी दुनिया भुला दी हमने तेरे लिए
जेसे  तुम  से   मोहब्बत   ही   काम  हमारा  हो

  दिल   ने  ‌तुम्हें   दर्जा  रब   का  दें दिया   है
अब तो इश्क ही तेरा काबा और चारों धाम हमारा हो